Que Sera

Been all over the place emotionally lately. Fine during the day, lonely and depressed at night. I know a large part of it is just living alone but my mind has been so much on the past. Past “would’ve could’ve should’ve”. I feel like I let a few good people slip through my fingers that i just clicked so easily with. I don’t understand why its so hard for me to find that with people, but I only seem to cherish it with someone when it’s too late. But, such is the course of my life. 25 and perpetually single. Most days I look around and I feel like I’ll never find it. That right fit. That look that you see between two people who can’t get enough of one another. It always leaves me questioning legitimately what’s wrong with me. Not in that self depricating whiney sort of way, but in a frustrating way wondering if I’m oblivious to some sort of pattern I fall into with every “almost attempt”. Idk. Maybe it’ll happen eventually someday. Just would be nice if it was sooner rather than later.

…Welp that little tangent actually felt really good. Definitely going to start using this more. Especially since my instagram has become more of a motivational pep talk to myself than anything. Might be nice to escape to the place where I don’t have a lot of followers and it can be a little more honest and therapeutic…we’ll see.

As grandma always says, Que Sera, Sera.